Being Strong

You called again. I heard you cry.  I did my best to hold my tears in and portray myself as the emotionless being that I was so carefully crafting out of myself. I lost my strength when I heard your voice. The sound I longed to hear and feared at the same time. 54 minutes after then, I can still hear your voice in my head. I can hear you say that this might not be a good idea,to the dumb boy that fell in love with you 7 years ago, I can hear you cry out your sadness to the grown up that I have become. When you asked if I can move on, I heard your voice ask if the boy that made you all the promises is still alive somewhere.

He is still there, but he cannot stay. I have to kill him now. I can not keep him fighting the others. What you should know is that he’s changed too. He lost his mind the very day you stopped calling. He is in a dark place now, killing or getting killed is the only thing he knows. Nobody can blame him, it’s his life that they took away and changed everything that was his reality. No he cannot be let out. 

The new being is stronger, better and emotionless. But the boy draws strength from your voice messages and memories. If he breaks away it’s the end for all. 

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